Unsolvable Puzzle
by Vx Tao Ren xV
Summary: A deep Ren introspection about Yoh.. (for lack of a better summary)... Warnings for random character bashing, angsty-ness, and shounen-ai free.. and yet still pretty good!;; Chapter 05 Up after who knows how long...
1. Chapter 01: Who?

"Unsolvable Puzzle"

-Vx Tao Ren xV

Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to me, despite what I tell myself (sad, isn't it?). It belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all of his glory.. So please, don't sue me… I'm broke anyway…

Author's Notes: This is my first and completely one-shot fic. It is basically a Ren introspection on.. well.. Yoh (so the entire fanfiction and all of it's chapter's will be Ren's P.O.V.).. This is not any type of shounen-ai fic, so if it seems like it at times, I apologize.. it's not supposed to ^_^;;..

***

"Unsolvable Puzzle": Chapter 01

Dare?... Kisama wa... dare?

Who?... Who are you?

Are you truly that seemingly selfless shaman who believes that no shaman-- no, that practically no being on this planet can harbor a heart of the slightest bit of darkness within themselves...?

Or is there something more to what we all see?

Or is there something less... hiding beneath your indestructible shield of hope and light?...

...Asakura Yoh...

Who?

Who can be more difficult to decipher.. behind that smile of yours? This carefree, laid-back, lazy shaman without a worry in the world. Other shamans, face it-- nearly all shamans who have ever met you, view you as what the see: this.. carefree, laid-back, lazy shaman... without a worry in the world. 

But... there's more to you, isn't there? We're just too blind to see it...

...Asakura Yoh...

Friendship... free-will... life... happiness... peace... hope...

These are the things you defend the most... you value the most. Whenever one of those elements are threatened or destroyed, you take off that mask on infinite happiness... that seems to be forever glued onto your face. You become determined, ready to fight, willing... hell-- you may even become angry.

Who?

Who else would be able to do that? Other than you...

Be willing to fight the evils... while knowing in your heart, that the evils... aren't really evils... just pure hearts with driving intentions and determinations that bring an evil aura to the eyes of some... most... or even all...

Hell.. you even think Hao has his reasons...

Who?

Who could have thought that you... Asakura Yoh... could have such a story.. such.. influencing power and ability hidden, behind that smile of yours... That same damn smile... that irritating trademark on your face.. reformed even the worst shamans, the most confused shamans, and even the shamans completely consumed by darkness and hatred at a level beyond saving... me..

Who?

Who else can have that power?.. That ability...

Except you...

...Asakura Yoh...

*** 

Chapter 01 Owari ^_^

That's all.. and I realize that it's a bit short, I apologize for that. Anyway, I also realize that Ren-Bochama may seem a little bit out of character here, I apologize for that too.. and if you don't think so.. then.. nevermind! ^_^.. Chapter 02 will be here very soon.. I promise. In the mean time, review onegai shimasu!! Oh, and no flames please, although if you really want to… have fun!

Arigatou gosaimasu! 


	2. Chapter 02: What?

"Unsolvable Puzzle"

-Vx Tao Ren xV

Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to me, despite what I tell myself (sad, isn't it?). It belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all of his glory.. So please, don't sue me… I'm broke anyway…

Author's Notes: Second Chapter up ^_^.. This is getting pretty involved for a one-shot fic (and with the second chapter, I'm realizing Ren-Bocchama really isn't out of character.. ).. hope you're all enjoying it so far! And thank you for your reviews.. they made my day brighter.. (and those that know me know that's pretty hard to do, ne?)!!!

***

"Unsolvable Puzzle": Chapter 02

Kisama… ima… nani atenda?…

What?

What are you dreaming about this time?

What you will do when Shaman King…

What you will do to become Shaman King…

What Hao's reasons for killing are…

What you will do to defeat him… to help him see the light… 

What your vicious fiancée will do to you if you don't become Shaman King…

What you're going to do to escape…

No, you aren't thinking about any of those things. And there's a simple reason to it.

You're selfless…

…Asakura Yoh… 

…you're a selfless bastard…

You wouldn't be thinking about what you're going to do when Shaman King… what you're going to do to stop Hao…

No, not you.

You're probably thinking to yourself about the weather for as far as I know…

But that's just it—I don't know…

No one does…

Not me, not anyone else, even thought they all might think that they do. The only person who may actually know you… the way you think… what you're like underneath that always-happy mask of yours, if there's a mask at all… is Kyohyama Anna…

…that fiancée of yours that seems to terrify the living daylights out of nearly everyone… even the spirits, who are already dead.

It's impossible to think that there is no mask. That there's nothing more to you than your smile and thoughtfulness…

…bullshit…

No one can live off of a smile their entire lives.. no one.. not even you…

…Asakura Yoh…

What?

What are you hiding from the rest of the world?

…Asakura Yoh…

Every being on this earth, no matter how pure or how filthy, has something to hide.. even you. You may be hiding something from us… from all of us, your partners… from yourself. But we don't know.. we can't help... you won't let us.

What?

What are your reasons?

What are you so afraid of?

Do you feel responsible to look after us, while we face our own evils? That you can't afford to take heed to the darkness in your own heart, for it may take consequence on the ones that you care for most… to one of us?… your partners… your friends…

Is that why you're always smiling? To reassure us that everything will.. actually.. be okay.. whether or not we believe it or not.. to always keep that flame of hope burning.. to show us a common goal… to never give up.. is that why you're always smiling?

Nonsense.. it doesn't work Yoh… at least, not most of the time…

Selfless… that's what…

You truly are a selfless bastard…

What?

What have you been thinking to be such a way? To do such a thing?…

…Asakura Yoh…

*** 

Chapter 02 Owari ^_^

It's a little bit longer than Chapter 01.. I think.. Don't worry.. I'm working on it.. Along with Chapter 03.. but it may take a while, so be patient. In the meantime.. please review and tell me what you think… Arigatou yo!


	3. Chapter 03: When?

"Unsolvable Puzzle"

-Vx Tao Ren xV

TANJOUBI OMEDETOU YOH TO HAO-SAMA!!! ^_^

(Happy Birthday Yoh and Hao-Sama!!! )

Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to me, despite what I tell myself (sad, isn't it?). It belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all of his glory.. So please, don't sue me… I'm broke anyway…

Author's Notes: Here's Chapter 03.. I finished it much faster than I thought I would. Oh.. and I fixed the whole anonymous review thing (Thanks unpredictable.l for bringing that to my attention ^_^).. Toriaezu, This chapter was originally written with two different versions since I kept on getting different approaches to write about.. so I tried to combine them together.. emphasis on "tried". I don't know if it makes much sense (see, I even confused myself with this one).. if it doesn't, suman.. if it does, enjoy ^_^ 

Message for Anna (Serena): I don't appreciate the cracks at the end of your review too much.. so.. I'm gonna insult you whenever I can in this fic.. and you can't get mad… you know why? Because.. it's all for the justice! ::maniacal laughter:: Or.. I'll just hit you with my glaive.. but this time, I'll have a reason ^_^ ::laughs some more:: (Yes, I know, I'm a strange lunatic with a glaive [seriously].. that you'd probably see chasing some other relatively strange people down the street while trying to beat the living daylights out of them.... If you want proof, ask Serena, she'd gladly explain it to you..)

Author's Notes (continued): Ahh.. now that I've gotten that out of my system.. here's Chapter 03, I hope you like it ^_^

***

"Unsolvable Puzzle": Chapter 03

Itsu kisama no egao ga kieru no ka…?

When?

When will you stop smiling?

When will you stop caring… stop helping people…?

Stop being… you?

…Asakura Yoh…

When?

Ha! I'll tell you when…

When that damn ice shaman develops some sense of intelligence… when that midget friend of yours grown two inches… when your stone-faced fiancée smiles in public… when that freakin' Chocolove tells a joke that con be considered funny… when Hao stops wearing that poncho of his.. or stops harassing me about joining his faction.. which ever comes first..

In other words… never.

When?

When will you get out of my way?

…Asakura Yoh…

When will you remove yourself from my path…?

…my path to becoming Shaman King…

..never…

…but it's not because it's your path as well as mine… and about a million other shamans…

… it's how you help people.. how you find those people to help…

Think about it.

Pretty much every shaman and spirit you've ever met has met you somewhere on the road to become Shaman King. Usually during a fight.. that's when you meet them.. your next helpless soul to rescue… and after that fight.. you change them… every time.

Amidamaru… Bokutou no Ryu… neesan… Pyron… Ryu's spirit—whatever his name is… Lyserg… me… along with many other Shaman Fight teams.. yes, the entire teams..

Only few have been immune to your.. epidemic of happiness and light-heartedness that you spread where ever you go.. but not many.. the X-LAWS.. Hao.. his faction members… the only survivors of the disease..

The disease known as Asakura Yoh…

When?

When will your smile fade?

Hmph …Asakura Yoh… without a smile…

Nonexistent.. ridiculous…

…but if there were a time when Yoh never smiles, it would surely be the sign of the apocolypse. If Yoh's smile ever faded.. other than for reasons previously mentioned (A/N: See Chapter 01's second "Who" interpretation), he wouldn't be the same person… the same shaman.. the same damn selfless shaman that he is.

That's how he transmits his voice to other people's and spirit's hearts… his smile…

…that constant, annoying, cheeky-grinning smile.

…How I would love to wipe that smile off of your face, Yoh…

But… when that smile leaves… so does his spirit… his identity… his ability.. to convince us all… his friends.. that "it's all going to be okay"…

Hmph.. Why should I care? 

*Insert sarcasm here* Yes… I'm sure.. it's all going to be okay… 

…Asakura Yoh…

*** 

Chapter 03 Owari ^_^

Now that wasn't that bad, was it? Nah, not really.. I think it was just extremely confusing when I wrote it. Tonikaku, I hope you enjoyed it and review kudasai na! ^_^.. If you want to flame, I'd prefer if you didn't.. but if you insist on it.. knock yourself out! (You can take that either sarcastically, or literally.. which ever works for you..) Chapter 04 coming soon.. I hope, so please be patient.. Ja ne!

Here's my present, I hope you liked it.. Happy Birthday Hao-Sama! Happy Birthday Yoh!


	4. Chapter 04: Where?

"Unsolvable Puzzle"

-Vx Tao Ren xV

Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to me, despite what I tell myself (sad, isn't it?). It belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all of his glory.. So please, don't sue me… I'm broke anyway…

Author's Notes: Here's Chapter 04, I actually had half of it written for months, but since it was only half, I couldn't post it. The extreme, extreme delay is also due to my working on "Of Revenge, Deceit… and Snowcones" every minute I have that I'm not reading, buying a Hayashibara Megumi CD, failing a Chemistry Regent, or well… sleeping. I'm afraid that until "Of Revenge, Deceit… and Snowcones" is completed, "Unsolvable Puzzle" will be my second priority (unless I finish it beforehand), so please be patient… very, very patient.. Arigatou! Oh.. and my writing style has gotten well, bad, okay not bad, but different from the other chapters, I find it extremely noticeable (most likely due to my lack of involvement in this fic.. I've lost the vibe of it), I'm going to make an effort to fix this as best I can, forgive me, please… (Shut up, Anna!)…

Oh yeah.. after looking over the reviews, I'm going to say this now before any one of you people repeat it.. Horohoro! Ren insults people! That's what he does! So deal with it! And you hugged me approximately 4 times after I put up chapter 3.. so you may possibly be mentioned again.. and it WILL be an insult.. so prepare yourself.. and if not.. don't worry I'll get you… if not in this fic, in another… plus, if that doesn't work, I can always burn down your house, or at least another happy animal shirt… and Anna, you probably won't get mentioned again.. along with anyone else.. unless I figure out a way to incorporate all of the characters again.. Anyway, if I'm ever in a good mood for whatever reason and I happen to be writing this, I may actually say something nice, but don't expect it.. unless those last 7 episodes of the series finally land themselves at my door… which I doubt (freakin' 2 months on backorder… almost)… 

Anyway.. now that I'm finished ranting.. please read, review, and enjoy… although this chapter may not be up to par with the other chapters…

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"Unsolvable Puzzle": Chapter 04

Doko… Doko wa kisama no himitsu?

Where?

Where will this path lead?

That neverending path of joy and happiness in your heart..

Where will it lead you?

Where will it lead us?

…the people who you have put on this path to journey with you into the unknown depths of your spirit… 

…your nature… your soul..

…Asakura Yoh…

Where?

Where are your secrets hidden?

Your deepest, darkest secrets and fears that are completely non-existent outside of that mind of yours. That mind that no one can understand.. not fully anyway.. that no one can decipher… the unsolvable puzzle…

…Asakura Yoh…

Where?

Where is the key?

Where is the key that unlocks the door of your fears and allows them to escape into the open, to face the world… to face us… You keep them hidden inside of your mind; inside of your heart… but that's not healthy… but then again… you're Yoh… you're the universal exception… to absolutely everything. Who knows? There may not even be a key, there maybe no hidden secrets or darkest fears… No, impossible, I won't let it be possible, I have to solve the riddle… I will solve it, whether you want me to or not. 

Where?

Where are your eyes?

Where are your eyes in that you can't see the darkness. No, you can't see it… you can only recognize it, you can't see or understand it. Maybe that's why you can't ever be consumed by it. It may probably be why I can never escape it, I've always been around the darkness, I've become familiar with it, I've become consumed in it. But you, you're like the sun. That annoying light that shines upon everyone's face, no matter where they are on this earth. No one can escape the sun's rays.. No one can escape your influence… no matter how hard they try…

…Asakura Yoh…

Where?

Where is your face?

Not your actual face, baka.. Your true face. It can't be possible that the stupid smiling face that seems to be copyrighted to you until the Asakura line drops off of the face of this earth, is how you really are, what you really feel, what your true emotions are. It's impossible for one human being to be happy all of the time. This is the one time where you are no exception… the one and only time. You need to take off that mask you're wearing, to give you the feeling of fresh air to relieve your spirit, and your true self. This is the best thing to do, for you Yoh, that is, not to keep showing us that dopey smile to keep is "healthier" in spirit, but to actually help yourself for once, you selfless twit. 

Where is your health?

Don't do this, don't hide. Hiding always makes the emotions expand, since they have no where else to go except the rest of your body… I know from experience, keeping yourself completely hidden from the world will eventually lead to your demise, destruction, death… I can't—I won't let that happen to you.. that's my job… 

… Asakura Yoh…

*** 

Chapter 04 Owari…

I know it's not very good compared to the others… and it's extremely short compared to the others, but it was the best I could come up with while listening to Nyorai's chanting for 2 hours straight… Toriaezu, please review anyway.. it may give me future inspiration. The next and final two chapters will definitely be better… much better, so just hang on! And thank you to the people that have been reviewing ^_^.. even Horohoro and Anna.. besides the fact that I tell you to review on a daily basis ^_^;;.. Arigatou na!


	5. Chapter 05: Why?

"Unsolvable Puzzle "

-Vx Tao Ren xV

Disclaimer: Shaman King obviously does not belong to me, despite what I tell myself (sad, isn't it?). It belongs to Takei Hiroyuki-Sama in all of his glory.. So please, don't sue me… I'm broke anyway..

Author's Notes (**Please Read**): Oh my God.. I'm actually updating this fic! It's a miracle I tell you! Like I've said before, now that summer is here, I have nothing to do, excluding work, so I have a lot more time to finish these unfinished fics that are floating around. This one has been plaguing me in particular. This was my first fanfiction ever, and has been untouched for the longest period of time. _Please try to regard this as sort of a new beginning_, since I can't remember how I wrote the others in terms of the approach I made and what I wanted to convey... Forgive me if it's a bit different than before..

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"Unsolvable Puzzle": Chapter 05

_Naze__ kisama no kao wa onaji.. zutto.. _

Why?

Why is your face the same.. always..

It's not that you carry the same emotionless expression everywhere, in any situation.. it's that you carry the same happy, unconcerned expression everywhere, in any situation. You seldom get angry; I've never seen you truly sad; Always the smiling, happy, "Nanto ka naru sa"...

Asakura Yoh..

Why?

Why don't you show your true face?

Why can't you possibly show others around you what you're truly feeling? Why do you insist on being happy and encouraging all of the time? I don't understand what the purpose can be, what the benefits are. Keeping to yourself is the long goodbye, the start of the drifting away to the ones you love.. the ones you help.. everyone that you know. I know that best.

But I can't understand why that doesn't apply to you. Despite the fact that you hide yourself from us, you hide everything from us, you aren't drifting, you aren't leaving... you're here.. with all of us. Always. Even when you aren't physically here, you're with us, all of us.. and you're laughing. You're always laughing..

.. Asakura Yoh..

Why?

Why are you always laughing?

Are you laughing out of true happiness? Somehow I can't believe that. No one in this world is truly happy. Not even you. Are you laughing at the world? Laughing at what it's become.. how nature is neglected, how polluted it has become.. how I used to view it. I can't believe that either. If that is really why you're laughing, then you wouldn't have bothered to save me. You wouldn't have shown me that people really aren't as filthy as I had thought. You wouldn't have persistently tried to have shown me that there's hope. You wouldn't have opposed Hao. Then why?..

.. Asakura Yoh..

Why?

Why must you hide?

Everyone has something to hide, but why must you? You, of all people. You reform nearly everyone that you meet. I know that best. Why must you feel the need to keep your feeling from us, the ones you've helped, the ones you've saved.. Why are you afraid that we can help you? Why do you reject the help of all of those closest to you? The ones you've helped so many times.. the ones beyond saving.. the ones like me. Why do you never open up to us? Do you not trust us? Do you not believe that we can help? Do you not think that we can understand? Even if we couldn't Yoh, we would try. We would try to understand to our greatest extents and further. We would make ourselves understand! Why don't _you_ understand that?!?!

.. Asakura... Yoh..

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Owari! This may have been the shortest chapter yet, but I'm okay with that because I really like the intensity in the last part.. it makes Ren seem like he's given up on Yoh to some extent.. I like it! ::wide smile::

Please review this chapter. I want to know if this is as good as before (since I haven't touched this fic in such a long time), and if I should make it longer like the others, I personally like it if it's short, with that tiny bit of intensity at the end.. I think if goes a long way. (Plus it really helped since I couldn't remember how I had written the other chapters and how I wanted to approach it). I don't think that I could maintain that same feel if I made the chapters longer, it would seem a little too random in my opinion. Or maybe I'm losing my mind and making excuses for why it's so short! Please let me know if I should make the next and final chapter like the others, longer with more anxiety, or like this one, shorter with more slightly dramatic insights. It'd be a great help to me. Thank you! Please review and let me know!


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